Thursday, November 10, 2005
 BUDDY, CAN YOU SPARE A DIME? -- The major oil companies are expected to earn $96 billion in profits this year (that's a lot of cabbage) which probes the question: "What you gon' do with all that junk?"
I know, we'll throw a "Senate party" and invite in the media to talk about it.
GOUGE-GATE OIL PROBE: At a staged Senate hearing the oil giants defended their record $34 billion in summertime profits by saying Wall Street is twice as greedy. I think they even tried the O.J. Simpson defense saying they are "looking for the real killers."
Exxon Mobil's veteran chief Lee Raymond flatly told a Senate hearing yesterday that "oil [profit] numbers are huge - because our industry is huge." -- and my wife needs to shop at Gucci.
"On an apples-to-apples comparison, we're in line with the average of all U.S. industries," he said. Is $96 billion the new average for company profits?
Oil lobbyists warned the Senators (most of which are already in their right pocket) in a veiled threat that a windfall tax most likely would disrupt exploration and gasoline refining, creating even higher prices and shortages.
"History teaches us that punitive measures, hastily crafted in reaction to short-term market fluctuations, will likely have unintended negative consequences," said Raymond.
TAX BREAK SURPRISE: the oil companies did admit they didn't need the $15 billion in tax breaks voted to them recently by Congress (but they didn't offer to give it back).
KEEPING UP APPEARANCES WITH THE HUNGRY-MAN: The main point that the best P.R. company can't overlook is how a tiny minority now owns the means of producing the kind of wealth that the oil industry generates while people go hungry, cannot find jobs and go without basic necessities like health care and adequate housing.
How about you try the "Bill Gates approach to wealth," and give back a few dollars to those that can't by.
By Henry Cruz
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